Why Authoritative Parenting Style is Proven as the Best One?

 What is Parenting? 

Parenting is the programming of generations. 

 In the process, a marital couple raises and nurtures their child. Until he becomes a responsible individual. That child as an adult is ready to make his own family. He or she gets married and raises their children. The cycle in this way goes on. Some values have been passed down through generations. There are always some alterations in every generation. In this way, every person in the world is a unique combo of diverse characteristics. 

The common parenting activities are feeding, teaching and disciplining. Parents also provide physical, social and emotional support to their children. 

What is parenting style? 

Parenting Style is the combination of the different strategies. These are used by the parents for raising their children. 

Parenting Styles are defined as the global environment of the home. It influences the child’s development and overall well-being. 

Types of Parenting Styles: 

Different researchers describe different categories of parenting styles. 

The first three styles are authoritative, authoritarian and permissive parenting styles. These were identified by developmental psychologist Diana Baumrind at the University of California. The fourth style, the uninvolved or neglectful parenting style was added by Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin at Stanford University. 

Types of parenting styles: 

1. Authoritative Parenting: 

The authoritative parenting style is a warm, caring and supportive environment. It is provided by the parents while asserting clear boundaries for discipline. Parents want to govern their children, still in a positive way. This style fosters two-way communication. Where parents communicate the logic behind the rules and the children can also communicate their thoughts and feelings. In this style, parents often entertain children’s questions and feedback.

Parents use high levels of expectations from their children. But these expectations also have some logic and settled by considering the abilities of children. 

Moreover, the parents also try to accomplish their responsibilities. Such as to encourage and support their children while training them for the future. 

Although this parenting style is effort and time-consuming. But the biggest advantage of Authoritative Parenting is its positive outcomes. Results are in the form of high self-esteem and better emotional regulation. Often children are good at problem-solving and have successful mindsets. 

2. Authoritarian parenting: 

In this style, the parents behave as an authority figure. They try to rule over the little souls. They use a high level of demand while providing little affection and support. They set strict rules without discussing their rationale. They want mindless obedience from their children.  

The flow of communication is one-sided often in the form of orders. Children are neither allowed to share their opinions nor to give feedback. While enforcing rules, authoritarian parents use harsh punishments.

This parenting style gets immediate control over their children. Children tend to behave well because there is no other opinion for them. But ultimately they suffer, especially as this provokes issues in their adolescence. Mostly they have poor self-esteem, and behavioral, emotional and mental health complications.  

3. Permissive Parenting:  

This type of parent is too lenient towards children’s pleasure. This depicts a high level of warmth and a low level of expectations. 

They excessively focus on children’s immediate pleasure and mood. First, they set a few rules and even when the children break them, they avoid confrontation.  

Children have the full freedom to say or do anything. They don’t consider them accountable before anyone. 

The children are high in confidence and self-expression. But this also leads to a lower level of self-control and a higher level of impulsivity. 

The children from this parenting style also suffer in their later life. They expect the same attitude from the whole world but it rarely happens. When things go against them, they feel frustrated. 

4. Uninvolved or Neglected Parenting:  

Uninvolved parents are detached, cold and neglectful. They have the least concerns about demands and responsiveness towards children. They minimally communicate with their children. This parenting style is an example of abstinence. Here neither discipline nor considerations for other needs are provided.  

Parents seem to be preoccupied with their own concerns. They deliberately ignore their parenting responsibilities. 

The children may suffer from emotional distress and behavioral and mental health issues.  

Ignorance restrains their development. It hinders their potential by leaving them with unfulfilled capabilities and unrealized growth. 

Parenting Styles Explained Through a Real-Life Scenario:

Here a real-life example is given to better understand the concepts of different parenting styles and their comparison to each other. 

Scenario: Dinner Time Dilemma 

Situation: You give an hour to your child to complete his homework. But he didn’t do it till dinner time. 

1. Authoritative Parenting Style: 

- Approach: You set a clear expectation that the homework should be completed first. You explain very calmly and evidently why completion of their homework is mandatory for them. And if they need any help in this regard, you are always here to support the child. 

- Outcome: The child completed his homework on time. Because he understood that the expectations were obvious. And also realized the support.  

2. Permissive Parenting Style: 

- Approach: You asked the child to do his homework. But you are negotiating with the child and put it up to him that when he completes his homework 

- Outcome: The child gets busy negotiating and takes the homework very lightly. Then at the last time, if he tried to complete the task that led to stress and poor work quality.  

3. Authoritarian Parenting Style: 

- Approach: You set very strict rules for the competition of homework. You bluntly describe its corresponding punishment. And that, there is no room for discussion.  

- Outcome: Although the child completed his homework on time. But the real intrinsic behind this homework is fear. The child feels anxious and stressed due to which his learning process also suffers. 

4. Uninvolved Parenting Style: 

- Approach: Due to any reason you are uninvolved with the child’s concerns. You didn’t notice his homework either he did or didn’t. 

- Outcome: The child may neglect the homework. Because he isn’t aware of its importance as well as he doesn’t have any type of support. This leads to poor academic performance or other behavioral issues. 

These different types of parenting styles help us to understand a general foundation. There are no defined boundaries of these categories. Many parents practice a combination of these approaches. The problem arises when parents choose these approaches, either according to their mood or shifting their style due to outward circumstances. These may impact the child negatively. Instead of this parents should choose parenting strategies wisely. 

As time has progressed, parenting styles have also diversified. These may reflect the evolving needs and varied experiences of modern families. This diversity shows how our understanding of effective parenting has expanded. 

6 Sub-types of Parenting Styles 

Some researchers expand these four major dimensions of parenting styles by additional subtypes.

1. Free-range Parenting Style: 

 In the early 2000s, the term free-range parenting gained significant popularity. It was originated by a journalist and author Lenore Skenazy. 

This style advocates for granting full freedom to the child. This idea says children should have the opportunity to take calculated risks in life. They should have real-life experience to develop their skill on their own. Such parents consider independence as a crucial element in children’s development. 

They believe children should be engaged in age-appropriate activities without constant adult supervision. Hence, children may develop resilience, self-reliance and problem-solving skills. 

2. Snowplow Parenting Style: 

 The snowplow is a metaphorical term. It represents the parents who remove all possible challenges and difficulties for their children. 

This style is also known as bulldozer or lawnmower parenting. These parents are highly proactive for their children. They try to provide them with a smooth journey free from any discomfort or failure. They are overwhelmed to protect their children from mistakes and any negative consequences. They may go to extremes to secure their child by manipulating results or completing tasks for them.  

3. Helicopter Parenting Style:

This parenting style is characterized by excessive involvement of parents in children’s activities. These parents closely monitor and consistently guide their children. Parents tend to micromanage their tasks. 

They make decisions on their children’s behalf. 

Parents believe that their constant involvement may ensure their children’s success. They are also afraid of confronting their child with failure and disappointment. For this, they hover over their child just like a Helicopter. 

Unlike snowplow parenting, where the major focus is on removing obstacles, helicopter parents closely observe every step, get involved, and guide and protect their child in every situation. 

4. Tiger Parenting: 

Amy Chua in her book “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother”, used the term tiger parenting. This parenting style is based on strict discipline with very high expectations especially related to academic achievements and career success. Tiger parents always expect their children to achieve top ranks. They push children to excel in curriculum as well as in extracurricular activities. To achieve this excellence they have to be more strict.  

However, their intense attitude leads their children towards a lack of confidence and low self-esteem. It also has negative impacts on the parent-child relationship.  

5. Attachment Parenting Style: 

Attachment parenting draws its principles from the attachment theory, presented by psychologist John Bowlby. This parenting style is based on creating a secure attachment bond between parent and child. The focus of these parents is to provide responsive and sensitive caregiving. Gentle discipline, emotional availability and co-sleeping are some key practices of this parenting style. The parents believe that a strong bond serves as the solid foundation for a child’s development and well-being. 

6. Lighthouse Parenting Style:

The term lighthouse is a metaphorical approach. It refers to a parenting style where parents serve as stable guiding persons. They provide support and create a safe environment for their children, while granting them independence and autonomy. Just like a lighthouse is a symbol of guidance substitute for the detection of directions. The balance of support and independence encourages the children to explore and learn from both their successes and mistakes. This nurtured environment helps to develop resilience and a growth mindset in children. 

Parenting is an Art: 

It is essential to understand parenting style and be considerate about parent-child relationships. Because, it has a very deep impact on children’s development and other important elements like health, behavior, well-being and performance. 

The majority of parents are uncertain about the accuracy of their parenting style. To some extent, all parents have positive intentions for their children’s well-being. They strive for their children’s success. However, their methods may differ, often based on their own personalities and experiences. It has been frequently observed that parents who experience personal challenges in their childhood, tend to be more lenient in those specific areas for their children. They desire to shield their children from facing the same challenges and complexes  

Cutting short, parenting is an ever-evolving journey. Sometimes it is messy but still beautiful. Parents should enjoy the little milestones of their children. This journey needs constant adaptation and flexibility. There is no one-size-fits-all approach. Sometimes parents have to adjust their chosen approach to better fit into children’s development level. Parenting includes the wise use of these approaches according to the children’s needs and situations. 

The Best Parenting Style: 

The authoritative parenting style is considered the best according to child psychology. American Psychological Association describes the authoritative parenting style as the supportive, nurturing still disciplined style of parenting. 

Two way communication helps the child to understand and corporate with the rules. This balanced approach draws its best outcomes in the form of the upbringing of a balanced personality.  

The Worst Parenting Style: 

Uninvolved or neglectful parenting style is the unhealthiest style of parenting. As it leaves the child deprived of any support and attention. Such children tend to face difficulties in managing their personalities as well as to adjust themselves in different situations. 

Can Mother and Father Have Differences in Parenting Styles?

It is also observed when both parents use different approaches. For example, one parent is authoritarian while another behaves more leniently. Also when one parent practices permissive parenting the other one tries to discipline their children. It can sometimes balance out the situation and may protect the child from severe adverse effects.

Practical Tips for Practicing the Most Appropriate Parenting Style: 

1. Clear and Logical Expectations: 

Set obvious expectations and communicate them in advance. Avoid vague statements like using terms or language that cannot be understood by younger children. Make minimal rules but stick to them. Rules should either focus on safety or moral values. Make sure the rules are appropriate and understandable according to the age and developmental level of the children. Also, clearly mention the consequences if rules are not followed.  

So create a simple chart of rules with your children. For younger children include visuals in it. Review it weekly accompanied by your children. This will reinforce their understanding. 

2. Empowering Young Minds Through Choices:  

Parents must involve children while choosing things or making little decisions for children. Take their opinion and let them think about their choices and preferences. Ask the child to discuss the reason behind their selection. This brings clarity to their thinking.  

Children should be trained in decision-making from a very young age. Like giving the children the autonomy of choosing what to wear and which flavor they will eat. By encouraging the children to explore their interests parents foster personal growth in their children. Moreover, this helps the child in developing a strong sense of identity. It also boosts their self-esteem.  

For example, let your child choose between fruit or a vegetable for a snack. You just explain the nutritional value of each option and how it assists in their overall health. 

3. Increasing Decision-Making Responsibility by Age:

Age and developmental level are the big factors to consider while upgrading decision autonomy for children. For instance, children in middle to late childhood can choose the tasks from the household chores list. The child as a high school student can choose the electives. Giving them proper space for experience assists their practical skills. It also ensures their ability to take responsibility for their actions. They feel accountable for the positive or negative consequences of their selection.  

Assign them age-appropriate tasks like choosing a family activity for the weekends or managing their homework schedule. By the time upgrade their responsibilities as they grow. 

4. Consistency While Disciplining: 

Consistency is the road to success. It works as the key to conquer any obstacle. It serves as the foundation of discipline by providing structure and stability. When parents are consistent and predictable towards rules, for children it is a more safe side. This fosters trust and respect as children know what to expect and what is expected of them.

Moreover, when children experience the consequences of their actions in a naturally consistent framework, they are more inclined to learn from their mistakes. It also helps in developing a sense of responsibility for the behaviors. 

Without an established routine, It becomes challenging to create a disciplined environment.

This environment is not just about rules. It also includes a reliable and nurturing atmosphere where children can thrive.

Practice a consistent approach towards the rules and consequences. Like if the rule is, “No screen time after 7 PM” then ensure that the rule is sustained to provide stability. 

5. Emotional Regulation: 

Parents should foster a comfortable environment for their children to openly express their thoughts and feelings. When children are expressing anger, jealousy, frustration or excitement allow them to express. As parents be sure to remain calm and composed by yourself. Prevent your inner anger or anxiety from becoming evident through your actions or words. Hence you model to be calm in stressful situations. 

Sit with them, listen to them. Label their emotions with a word. Thus, they learn a word to express what they are feeling. Besides this, they will realize that you understand them well. Being understood they cooperate with their parents and gradually learn to regulate their emotions. 

Things to avoid in this regard is the abrupt shelling of questions from the parents. Don’t rush that their feelings at once go away. Avoid trying hard to cheer them up and just immediately solve their problems. Instead of this, help them in understanding their own emotions. Also, guide them on how to go through the process. By incorporating these strategies parents tend to foster emotional resilience in their child. 

For example when the child is emotionally overwhelmed, calmly validate his feelings by saying, “I know you are upset. Let’s talk about it.” Model calmness through your behavior. Guide him in managing his emotions. 

6. Empathetic Discipline can Build Stronger Bonds:

While nurturing a strong parent-child bond, parents must make their children feel like their presence is valued and enjoyed by their parents. For this parents have to actively engage with their children. They should show their affection and make the time spent with their children more meaningful. Researches in emotional development highlight that when parents regard their children as blessings, this strengthens their sense of self-worth. 

Children should also be encouraged to enjoy life. While disciplining parents should instill the concept of not feeling overwhelmed by following the rules. Rather than make them believe that rules are like safety walls around us to save us from potential harm. To facilitate this parents should view the world from children’s perspective. Efforts should be exerted on spending quality family time. For a younger kid, remember play is his work. It is a perfect way to learn while enjoying. 

Integrate bonding into daily life by involving your child in activities like cooking or cleaning. During the tasks emphasize that their contribution is making a difference and value their presence. Also, explain how cleaning up toys helps everyone to stay safe and happy. This will not only reinforce the importance of rules but also strengthen your relationship. 

Conclusion:

 Parenting styles during the early years have significant impacts on children’s development. Authoritative parenting proficiently balances affection and discipline. It empowers the parents to raise confident, considerate and responsive children. It nurtures a solid foundation for moral values and emotional resilience in children. This approach sets a child on the path of ongoing success in life. So embrace the authoritative parenting style today to witness its benefits and transform future generations.